When Everything Competes for Your Attention — and Nothing Wins

I've been running my business for over 16 years, and I still have moments where I look at my life and realize everything I care about is fighting everything else. 

I'm a person with big aspirations and dreams, and I often find myself in a space where I can see the gap between the person I am and the person I want to be. Sometimes witnessing that gap is hard. Because you think — if I had done things differently, maybe I'd be further ahead. Maybe I'd be at a place where I feel like I've arrived.

But here's the point: it's not about arriving. It's about the journey and knowing you have the ability to rise to the occasion, close the gap, and remind yourself that you've done it before.

In my personal life, that looks like running a 5K. Most people can complete a 6-week program and be running. Not me. It's looking like it's going to take me closer to two years — not because I can't, but because of where I am in my life right now. Running exhausts me, and I can't have a week of client meetings and feel like I want to nap between them.

So my training schedule has to be lighter on some weeks. I've had injuries that slowed me down. And while it pains me to be patient, I'm learning to do it — because I know I'll get there, just not in a way that looks good on Instagram.

But I don't want to run one 5K and stop. I want this to be something I do for life. And that means I have to let my life mold around my goal, not force it.

It's the same for work goals. One of my next big projects is building my own thriving YouTube channel. I've built them for clients, but I often put all my energy into client accounts and neglect my own. Long-form video takes time. Plus, with my 5K goals, I can't go from being a sweaty mess to recording a video — so I have to get a lot of moving pieces to align. And yes, I can feel like I should have done this years ago. But if I had, something else I did might not have gotten done. So I try to live less in the past and focus more on my future. 

I mention all of this because if you don't take the time for alignment, everything competes for your attention instead of supporting each other. These internal battles can make you feel like it's too hard, too much, or maybe you aren't equipped to get there.

Change how you dream.

I used to focus on the final destination — the big goal, the end result, the version of myself who had it all figured out. Now I am building a system for the journey. Instead of "I want a thriving YouTube channel," I ask: What's the path that gets me there? What needs to happen first, second, third? What does this look like, broken into steps I can actually take, given where my life is right now?

When you shift from staring at the finish line to designing the journey, things start to feel less impossible. 

Set targets based on YOUR life, not someone else's highlight reel.

I have to set reasonable targets for myself that don't include what other people have done. My 5K journey doesn't look like anyone else's 6-week program. My YouTube channel won't grow at the same pace as someone who started five years ago. And that's fine — because their timeline isn't my timeline. 

Focus on your track record, not the gap.

When I really look back at my 16 years, so many great decisions got me here. That needs to be my focus. Not silencing the doubt, but using it to identify the gaps — so the feelings naturally quiet down and I can get on with doing something amazing.

Stephanie Redcross West is the founder of Vegan Mainstream and the author of Ready to Run, a biweekly newsletter for vegan coaches, consultants, and practitioners.